Our legs were entwined and we were feeling this moment, his arms wrapped around me,i was breathing in his his breath,palm to palm,wrist to wrist,toe to toe, “ ur safe now,man wont let no one touch my girl again” he held my chin as we were in bed,i smiled and put my arms around his neck,i felt bare safe.
“whats happened to them now – are they like,with the feds?” i asked.
“yeah – got caught by the feds cause neighbours next door was complaining of what dey saw – the old lady next door said dey saw dem pushing u in the house” he pecked my lips,i tasted colgate.
“mhmm” my pussy was kinda sore cause off all the fucking we done,8 hours straight we done.
I sighed while he bit his lip, “your so fuckin cheung , even wen uve got hair covering half ur face” he laughed and took the hair out my face, i giggled, but then i got bare angry all off a sudden,fear and anger both rushed into my head,i sighed and felt my forehead screwing up, i took my hands off his neck.
“why the fuck would u do that” i asked him.
“do what?” he asked not letting me take my palm out his hand,he kissed my thumb, “ i love you, dats why, i really do – would any ova man do that? Real talks shan , i actually fink im crazy in love with you” he laughed and shook his head, “ man don’t know whats happening to him , ive got HIV now” he laughed.
I ended up laughing, “stupid boy, i shouldn’t have let u” i jumped back into his arms and looked at him straight in the eyes,our eyes locked and everythin around me felt bare soft. But then my eyes started watering up and my bottom lip started trembling like i was gonna burst into tears.
He came closer,i closed my eyes and he kissed both off them, “why did u have to do that , why the fuck would you do that to urself” i wiped the tears coming down.
“shut up man – i fuckin love u” he came and hugged me bare tight.
I sniffed and put my arms around his waist – the sun was rising, then my phone rang.
“don’t lie youve got dat ringtone” he laughed, “ that was like,so last year” he said in a bitch girl American voice.
I burst out laughing,he sounded bare gay,but a beautiful gay,i giggled to myself as i got up and got my phone.
I looked at the ID and it was Prince, i walked off into the bathroom to answer it, connor called my name but i ignored it.
“hello” i picked up.
“yh im bless still, man has to tell u suttin”
“well go on then”
“nah i have to meet u to tell u ”
I sighed “prince i cant meet u im very busy” i wanted to spend the day with connor.
He kissed his teeth, “ ite” he took a deep breath,his voice was bare sexy,deep but like a permenant sore throat,any girl would be lucky to have him, “well.......” he went silent.
“yeah?” i started getting unpatient.
“SHANIQUAAAA who is it” connor called out from the bedroom.
“who was dat?” prince asked.
“never mind ,just look – hurry up please i need to go” i was getting pissed off.
“ite......” he took a breath, “well mans decided to develope feelings for u and ting,and dis isn’t no joke ting,cause man been dreaming about u and shit,i got proper feelings for u unah ,ive been hovering over ur name on my phone for like 3 days wondering if i should call u and trust me shaniqua i don’t get feelings for girls,its a lash and dash ting – u get me, but nah dis is proper man wants to make u wifey” .
I wanted to lauf when he said he had been dreaming about me and shit but to be honest i really didn’t know what to say.
“i.i...i have a man prince and i love him alot,im so sorry i didn-“ he cut me off.
“yeah i knew dis would happen,i shouldn’t have even told u about my feelings,ur the fuckin first girl ive even said dis to,i fuckin poured my heart out” he kissed his teeth,i didn’t say anything,the phone had some awkward silence for abit.
“nah i shouldn’t have been dat rude,sorry shaniqua its cool u have a man,and i know dat ur a good wife because ur telling me u have a man and u love him, sorry init,its just i like u bare and ive been thinkin about u 24 7,but hes waiting for u init,i guess i should go”he sighed,i felt sorry for him,he was a very beautiful boy,but i had my connor.
“its cool prince,and im so sorry,but we could be friends” i smiled.
He laughed, ”yeah -yeah we could”.
“um so ill see you around,bye prince,take care” i said while sctratching my leg.
“yeah,take care shan” he locked off.
I looked in the bathroom mirror and sighed to myself,i touched my hair,then my nose then my lips,i was really chueng and i should thank god for the features he gave me,the caramel skin,the tight curls,the natural raised eyebrows and rihannas soft lips, i was thinking off dying my hair red, then cutting it abit to make it shoulder lenghth.
I walked back into the living room,connor was reading a newspaper on the edge off the bed,i went behind him and kissed his neck,he reached out for my hand and i gave it to him,he kissed my thumb and put it near his heart.
“what u reading?” i asked.
“this little girl got shanked to death – in east London,next men came her house den raped her mutha then kidnapped the little 9 year old – they said if der mutha don’t end up paying 10 grand den their gonna kill the girl – dey didn’t have the money so the little girl got shanked up, sad alie”.
“stuipid cunts,why would they do that?” i got bare angry,i sat on his lap as he kept on reading it,it was the first time i ever saw him read a newspaper.
“so are we going barbadoes for my tr – our treatment?” i asked.
He nodded , “ yeah – my aunt had HIV and they gave good treatment to her,some old family doctor – oh shit,speaking off family,ive forgotten bout my mum bruv” he laughed and looked up.
I wanted to punch something as soon as he mentioned his mum,his mum kicked me out when i THOUGHT i was pregnant,with her stupid machine device thing.
He got his phone and dialled his mums number,i sat next to him on the bed, i yawned and walked to the bathroom while he was on the phone to his mum, i locked the door and sat down to take a piss,i saw little hairs growing on my pussy again,i needed to go for a wax.
I was gonna pick up my tooth brush but my phone started ringing again,i swear this cracked iphone was gonna get it,i didn’t bother looking up at the ID.
“hello” i said annoyed.
The line was silent for abit,but i knew someone was their.
“oh my gosh,HELLO?”.
Someone sniffed across the line.
“who is it?” i asked calmly.
She sniffed again,then i heard her croaky voice, “sh..shan” she burst out crying.
“Monisha?” i put my tooth brush down,i rested my left hand on the sink, “whats happened babygirl? Are u alright?”
“sha- shan, its-“ she sniffed again “its Smurkz”
I was getting abit annoyed with the problems they always have,theyre always argueing.
“what is it? Is he being a prick again?”
She started crying then sniffed, “nah its not even that, - he” she sniffed AGAIN. “he brought his boys round to the flat,then – they started r-“ she burst into tears again.
“what?!” i was bare pissed off, imagine trey songz coming your yard and your asleep for the whole time hes at your yard,and hes never gonna come again.
She was still crying, “im belling him now and then,ill call u in a bit” i hanged up before she could answer.
I went back into the room to tell connor but he was changing into his clothes – i looked at him for a bit,he didn’t realise i was looking at him,i didn’t think he realised i was their,but i didn’t want him to get involved,after what he did for me..i dotn want to bother him anymore,hes already got HIV because of me.
I walked back into the bathroom in my PJ shorts and vest top and locked the door, i looked for Smurkz in my contact list then texted him because i was over my contract already so i didn’t wanna use minutes.
‘come 12 roadside hill avenue,its Connors yard,don’t fink off starting commotion after what happened,wen ‘we’ tried shanking him up,its over and done with,i need to talk to u asap,its really important,and i fuckin mean it.’
I was brushing my teeth when i received a text like one minute later,i spat out the white shit.
‘kool’ he replied.
I kissed my teeth and continued brushing my teeth, i jumped in the shower and made sure i scrubbed myself hard,i scrubbedmyself harder around my pussy thinking that my HIV will go away, but it wouldn’t work because i knew it wouldn’t go.i just bawled for 10 minutes in the shower,to get everyfin out,all these meotions trapped,i had to accept life how it is,but like if u make wrong decisions in life u have to face the consequinces alie? I stopped crying cause it ownt get me anywhere,my pussy stung because off how much i scrubbed,i touched it and started crying. Connor knocked on the door.
“shan – u alright?” he opened the door,i thought i locked it.
I looked up,i was on the bathroom floor wrapped around in a towel,shivering and crying.
“shaniqua mannnnn” he came and hugged me,he kissed my forehead, “why u crying now eh? Everythings gonna be alright man,i promise” i nodded and he helped me get dressed,he made me scrambled eggs on toast and we both enjoyed the meal tucking in.
“remember that time we first fucked” he burst out laughing.
I kissed my teeth, “yeah like 5 months ago – oh my, i was so stupid, how can u grab my hand from behind and start pulling me towards u,u were some stranger u know,and u know what the funny thing is?”.
He was still laughing.
“we fucked like the next day,i gave my virginity to u man – how stupid was i – a boy i just met on road”
We both started cracking up.
He put his hand on mine on the table, “ but true say, look where its gotten us now”.
I smiled and giggled.
The door bell rang.
Connor pushed his plate away and was gonna stand up to get it.
He looked back, “yeah”
I didn’t know what to say,”its Smurkz at the door”
His face screwed nicely when i mentioned Smurkz! It was emotional,the screw on Connors face.
“why the fuck is dis dickhead at the door,is he stupid” he got up.
“CONNOR” i shouted back.
He turned around,”what man” he said with the screwface still on.
“hes here because i want to talk to him,its about Monisha?”
“don’t piss me off” he got off his chair.
“CONNOR” i felt like i was gonna cry.
“what man!” he turned around proper pissed.
“if u love me” i said calmly.
His screwface dropped and he looked calm, he kissed his teeth and walked into the bathroom,i heard him lock it,i sighed and answered the door,it was smurkz,his hair was out in a bush,it was up to his ears,but it was still a bush,his jeans,his nike shirt and his black and white airforces,he looked on point,i wanted to punch him in the face right now.
He stepped in, “nice place” he got comfy on the sofa.
“why the fuck did u get Monisha duppied” i got straight to the point,making sure i put my hands on my hips and rock out these asos jet black heels.
He laughed and put the magazine down,”i didn’t get Monisha duppied” he took his phone out and started fidgeting with it.
“u raped her Smurkz! Why the fuck would u do that”.
“yeah i did rape her but i didn’t duppie her”
“who the fuck did then?” i was trying not to get that rude because Smurkz wouldn’t hesitate to box me in the face.
“you really wanna know?” he laughed.
He went on his htc phone,and looked like he was going through things , “read the text” he said,then leaned back.
“its Friday init” he said,i got confused and just took his phone.
‘yeah 7 bills for Monisha,shes got mans yute,make sure u kill dat shit in her while ur at it holla at man wen ur done’
Sent : Thursday 12 May 19:48
Sender : Connor.