NO MORE POSTS - SORRY GUYS!

hello! I would like to tahnk anyone who has supported this story and has read it and liked it, I thank you all! I wrote this story nearly 2 years ago and i have recently just read it over again, what a crazy mind I had back then LOL but anyway, anyone still reading this now I would just like to stay I will no longer be making anykind of posts on this anymore, im leaving it and Tula the Sket isnt coming out so im sorry guys, too uch studying to focus on.

But thankyou anyone who liked the story and read it i appreciate it alot, i only wrote this story for you guys to read it and thank you for the lovely commentsi got, much appreciated!

UPDATE 2 - NEW STORY COMING OUT!

HEYYYY GUYSSS! :D its your favourite author here! lol no im just kidding :P but im just updating you people that TULA THE SKET is coming out! when i finish my exams in about 2 weeks time i shall write tula the sket, and as for alll you people that have finished reading my story from top to bottom, you probably already know who tula is :) so yeah, its just gonna be everything from tulas point of view and life! and blah blah blah, what she does after shaniquas death and how she copes with it and how she lives her life after that, but yeah thats all i guess, i hope you tell a friend to tell a friend and enjoy :) and STAY TUNED! :D

Update

hello you guys, um thank you for viewing the story, ive got 16,479 views on my blog :) shaniqua the sket is unfortunatly finished and i dont know if im going to write another story but just wanted to say thanks, i didnt think i would get this many views lol, much love.

keep sharing :)

Shaniqua The Sket Chapter 40 - THE END.

i didn’t remember anything after that,i just remember waking up with some man sobbing in a different room.
I got up the floor from exactly where i was when Kevin blasted the trigger,i looked down at my stomach and didn’t see any blood,i put both hands on my head because i had some bad headache,i felt like my brain was tryna escape from my skull,banging against it,i let out a cry off pain quitly,i think it was Kevin sobbing,i limped towards the kitchen where Monisha kept her pills,i picked my phone up from across the living room as i walked to the small cardboard boxed kitchen, i opened a couple of cupboards then found some paracetamol,i took 3 and gulped them down with my saliva,i coughed slightly then turned around to head for the room where the crying was coming from,it was coming from Monisha and Smurkz room.
I limped towards the door not trying to make too much noise.
It was Kevin sobbing.
Monisha was on the bed.
Dead.
He put his lips on her forhead and kissed her.
He turned his head round and saw me,then he put both hands on his face and started crying,”ITS ALL BECAUSE OF U” he sobbed “ ITS ALL BECAUSE OF U MY NEICE IS DEAD!”.
“i..i di-“.
“just please get the fuck out before i decide to shove a strap down your cum stained throat” he said calmly with tears stained down his face.
I kissed my teeth, “ well if it wasn’t for ur sketty neice to go and have a yute wit my man dis wouldn’t have even happened” and with that i grabbed a strap from the kitchen and dashed out the flat,i put the strap in my bra,well it wasn’t a strap it was a pen knife but anyway,i was on some usain bolt wave right now.
I was sprinting down the pavement into a park,and when i knew i was far from the estate i stopped and sat down on a bench,it was dark.
 i took deep breaths in because i ran too fast,i calmed down and looked at my blood stained jeans,why did they even have blood on them; the left strap on my vest top was ripped and  i looked like a lion,my hair was so bushy,i didn’t even know how my tight curls got like this,i had no shoes on and my feet were blistered and horrible,the nail polish on my toes were fading and it looked so ugly,the brownish nail polish was turning grey and it made my feet look like granny shits.
I looked around,it was bare cold,and i just clocked everyone was staring at me as they walked past,some woman sat next to me and tried bussing a convo with me like say i got out mental hospital? Bare tryna give me nhs numbers and shit.
“thank you but im alright” i kissed my teeth.
“now hunny,we all say that”
I looked at this blonde haired granny with some emosh screw ,”i said im alright,u understand English or something, Do i have to explain myself in Chinese - Hǎo ba, nǐ āng zāng de pìgu jíshí biǎo zi, nǐ háishì xiǎng zhīdào nǐ de liǎn le jǐ xiāng, qù xīshǔn nǐ de rǔtóu zhòu, tā mā de gǒu shǐ, zǒu kāi.” I then kissed my teeth,i learnt Chinese in school,and picked up on some rude words.
She literally ran,she literally ran like i was some crazy mad woman,i laughed to myself on the bench.
I looked at my phone,it was 11pm,i put it away and bawled,i bawled so hard my stomach was hurting.
“yo – u look like u need some help” he sat down and handed me a tissue.
I wiped my tears with the tissue but didn’t stop crying inside,i looked up at him,my pussy started getting wet,my nipples were becoming erect and my back – i felt goosebumps all the down my back.
This boy was emotional,he was a lighty,with slits in his eyes,shapeup was neat and was wearing his hood up,a boy like this carries neat tissues in his pockets.
“uh”
He laughed,his smile made my bones go weak,his mouth was like chris browns i notices “y u moanin”.
My senses came back to me,”he used me”i looked straight in front off me into the darkness,”he used me,it was all a lie” i managed to say without bursting into tears again.
He put his arm around me “u need loving” he put his hand on my blood stained jeans.
I looked at him,then i lipsed him,i lipsed him so hard.
His tongue came in my mouth,i put my arms around his masculine neck,his chest squeezed against my breasts,i jumped on his lap,his man hood pressed against me,he put his hands up my top,in my bra,massaging my tits as i explored my tongue in his sexy mouth. He came down and kissed my neck,sucking on it,making me moan,i dint even know his name,he had a tattoo on his neck saying ‘Reignz’ that could have been his tag.
He used his hands to push my tits up,then he sucked on my cleavage,i didn’t stop him,fuck connor,i need dick.
He stopped, “u wan cum wit me” i nodded then he grabbed on my hand and we crossed the road to a whip,it was a black Vauxhall.

He opened it then we stepped in at the backseat.
He ripped my top off and pushed down my jeans,he took his hood off and pulled down his trackies,he looked about 18|19.
He came down on me,pushing his tongue in my mouth,my pussy was soaking,it was literally leaking,i was so wet.
“u ready yh” he whispered with his deep voice.
“nah lets go ur yard” i suggested.
He was quite for like aminute,”ite yh but a quick fuck now”.
I nodded,he looked so ni – SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT he entered his manhood in me.
“fuckkkk” i cried.
He laughed going superfast.
I felt the car moving as his 92038293 inch dick was pumping my pussy,it gave me medicine,it gave me loving,its just what i needed,just what i needed after going through all this stress,connor couldn’t fuck like him.
I let out some big moan ,i was gonna cum.
I looked at him,his face made me wetter,my thighs made that slapping cause of how wet i was,cum was all down my legs.
He pushed his chest against my breasts forcing his dick to go all the way out,”aiii” i cried.
He kept his dick all rammed up in my pussy for like 30 seconds still,then he took it all out and pushed it all in my pussy again,going as further as his manhood goes,he held it for like 30 seconds again,he done that like 5 times,i cummed nearly everytime he did,it felt so good,then he started slow fucking me.
“whats ur name sexy” he said fucking me slow.
My eyes were at the back off my head,i couldn’t even reply,”sh-sha-s” i gave up and done some BIG MOAN.
He laughed bare hard as he took himself out off me,he had stamina u know,he wasn’t even panting or anything.
I was breathing so hard my lungs had reached my throat.
He pushed his lips on mine my arms flung around his neck,he dug his fingers in my hot pussy,why couldn’t he stick his dick in der again.
One finger – i didn’t feel anything.
Two fingers – it was alright.
Three fingers – he left me paralyzed in pleasure.
He stopped and i was just breathing bare hard,i opened my eyes and he was just staring at me,naked, in his car.
He chukled then jumped in the drivers seat from behind, he started up his car, i rose up.
“were we going?” i asked putting my top on.
“my yard init” he said driving.
I didn’t really wanna go his yard anymore but i didn’t wanna say no.
He stopped driving after 10 minutes then we got out his car,his yard was nice,it wasn’t big ro anything,but it wsa really nice inside,the walls were decorated and it was bare clean.
I heard music coming from upstairs,sneakbo was playing.
He grabbed my hand before i could say anything and we pulled me upstairs,he lead me in some room,it was pink with butterflys over it,and pictures off porn stars.
Some girl was at the computer,she had shoulder length red hair,she turned around,i wanted to be sick,her nose was so fucking big,her grey eyes were sexy but her lips wernt doing it,they looked bare crusty,she was black but not blik.
“whos she” she asked looking at me.
“us lots r gonna be doing a ting init” he said sitting on the double bed,he went under the bed and got some white shit out.
He looked at me,”come” i came over.
The girl went back on the computer and put some porn on,she started watching it like say its casjj for a stranger to come in your room and u put porn on.
I sat on his bed and he lined up the coke on the little cardboard box with some asda giftcard.
“sniff some”  he said.
I looked up at him then looked at the coke,i bent down and sniffed a  line,i coughed slightly,but it was nice,it felt relaxing,i needed more.
I bent down for the second line and sniffed it up too,he laughed,i flung my head back sniffing it all up my nose.
I bent down again and sniffed another line up,i fell back on the bed, i didn’t know off my surroundings,i was so high,i just started giggling none stop.
The girl from the computer sat down next to me and started rubbing my tits,she took off my top and i lipsed her.
“oi karina finger her” he said as he sniffed a line,he was too sexy to fuck his life up,a boy like him could get into new York and shit to model and tings,hes fucked his life up bigtime.
She took my jeans off and threw them on the floor,she put two fingers in and started fingering me while lipsing me, i grabbed onto her boobs and started pulling her nipples,she let out a moan while she wsa kissing me.
She stopped and turned around to him,” can we suck ur dick please”.
He laughed and got up from the bed,i suddenly got up and walked over to him,i pulled his trackies down for him and grabbed onto his dick,i bent down and started kissing the crown,he grabbed onto my hair,the girl came behind me and got underneath me sucking my pussy,sucking all the juices out,it turned me on even more so i sucked on his dick harder, deep throating and making sure it felt nice,my tongue was massaging it as i sucked it.
“SHIT”.
He sounded even sexier when he was getting brain.
He stopped me and picked me up ,he put me carfully on the floor and i felt something go up me,it didn’t feel like a dick,it felt like a bottle or something,i moaned,he took it an and out off me faster i started moaning harder while grabbing onto my tits.
The girl started laughing and walked out the room,then next thing u know i hear barking coming up the stairs.
“reignz lets use terror” she said.
He laughed so haard,”blud ur disgusting”.
He got the little poodle off her and brought him next to my pussy,then i feel some big tongue across my pussy i moaned so hard as i gripped onto my tits harder,they both started cracking up,then FUCK.
I screamed,it bit my pussy.
I kicked the dog in the face,i put my hand on my pussy and it was full off blood,i started crying,the girl came and boxed me in the face,” stop cryin fuckin sket,its what u asked for” she punched me again.
Reignz came over me and kicked me in the face,i started cryin.
“get this std out my house”.
OH SHIT,,when he mentioned STD it reminded me i had HIV.
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA” i started laughing so hard it was unreal,laughing like a mad woman, HES GOT HIV,HES GOT HIV HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH,i was saying that to myself in my head all over again and again and again.
He looked at her and gabbed me by my hair,he threw me out the house naked and i was still laughing like a mental piece off shit,i was high.
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHA” i gripped onto my stomach,it was hurting because off how badly i was laughing,tears were forming in my eyes,my laughing slowly turned into crying,she threw my clothes out the window,my blood stained jeans,my blood stained and half ripped vest top,and my blood stained bra,i got to an allyway and i wore my clothes and made sure i wiped my pussy with some leaves before i put my jeans on,it stung so much,i was high and full off blood,laughing like a mad woman.
I was walking through Brixton at like 1 in the morning,me and connor was supposed to leave for Barbados at 4.
i looked for my phone and realised he took it, I put my hands in my head and started bawling so hard,i didn’t have shoes either,i brushed my hair with my fingers and tried neating it up but didn’t work.
I walked into a cornor shop and begged the man for a kitkat,after 15 minutes off begging he threw the kit kat in my face and told me to get out before they called the police.
I cried as i walked to the royal Brompton hospital,i eat half off my kit kat threw the rest away,i didn’t feel hungry anymore i just felt sick.
“hello miss can i help you” a lady said while looking at my blood stained clothes,i didn’t say anything,i just looked.
“Robert can you please take this young lady to the help centre,get her some new clothes and something to eat” she said to an old black man behind the reception.
I was high but all i could say was “thank you”.
He too my hand and lead me into a little room,it had a bed,a coffee machine and some hospital clothes on the bed.
I looked around and sat down on the bed and sighed,i looked at the blood from my pussy staining the whole left leg off my jeans.
“is their something you want to tell me dear?” the old man said.
I didn’t say anything.
“have you been raped?” he asked.
“is marko here” i bit my nails.
“their could be lots of markos here love,id their someone your loo-“
“i wanna see marko” i felt so dizzy.
“alright,come on then we’ll go reception and look for him,but get changed first,your clothes ar’nt looking to right hun” he limped over to the bed and gave me some hospital gown,i looked at it,”i don’t wanna wear this”.
He sighed,”ill see what i can do”.
He walked out the room,i got off the bed slowly and just looked at the ground,i started walking around in little circles,something i always used to do before my mum gave me my lunch,it was a habit., i kind of missed that hoe.
After a while,i wasn’t feeling that high,the old man with the stubborn beard walked back into the room and handed me a pair off old baggy jeans and a baggy plain black t-shirt and some pimpsoles.
“its the best i could find”
“thank you” i said while waiting for him to get out.
“is their something else you wa-oh i see ill go so you could get changed” he chuckled,”just come out when your ready so we could find marko for you”.
I waited for him to walk out,when he did i fell to the floor and just cryed,i didn’t know why but just cried,i missed connor so much,i missed his touch and his feel,his breath,his arms,his mouth,his chest,his loving,i needed him.
I didnt even wanna see marko,but he was the only person left,maybe he could help me out.
When i changed into the baggy male clothing and shoes me and the old man named bob went to the reception and looked for names under marko,then i found him.
“well,theirs marko smith,marko wright,marko hughes,mar-“
“marko hughes-thats him”.
“hes in ward...10 its just their” he pointed at a room, ”he’s in room number 2,would you want me to come with you or are you going to be alright ms coremstell”
“im going to be alright” i smiled at him and slowly made my way to the ward,i opened the door and saw room number two and my heart started beating bare fast, i was scared but i wanted to see marko,it had been such a long time.
I opened the door carefully and he was on his bed playing psp,he looked up,he looked so chueng,his hazel eyes,his light self,his juicy lips,his muscalr body was calling for me.
“marko”.
“shaniqua what – what r u doin here” he asked putting the psp down.
“um u said u wanted to talk to me,tula said tha-“
“oh yeah,i called u up but ur sister picked up,and” he scractched his head, “i forgot what i was gonna tell u anyway”.
He went back to playing his game on his psp,i looked at the desk near him,get well soon cards and flowers were placed everywhere,i just looked at him.
“marko,im so sorry about what i did,i shouldn’t have shanked u up” i said nervously.
He looked up,”yeah u shouldn’t have” he kissed his teeth, “why u here now anyway”he looked me up and down,”and y u wearin trampy clothin,i swear u was supposed to meet me here like 4 days ago,the thing i was gonna tell u could have been important unah , now i forgot it” he kissed his teeth.
I didn’t know what to say,”i..i wanted to see if ur alright”.
He laughed,”i cant move my legs,their paralyzed cuz off what u did to me, the veins have been disconnected from my brain because off how much shock i was in,i cant move them now,its gonna be like that forever,because off you” he said,i thought he was gonna  be angrier,but i didn’t know what to say.
“but maybe if you didn’t rape me or try beatin me to death it wouldn’t have happend,would it” i kissed my teeth and folded my hands.
I turned around and walked out before looking at the time,it was half past 2 in the morning,why did u even bother coming to see him,i unfolded my arms as i walked out the hospital realising i still had the little pen knife in my bra,i took it out making sure no one saw me as i walked the empty streets,then i knew where i was going,i was gonna visit connor,a little visit with this knife.
I laughed as i walked down the street,a van honked at me as it went past,i started running all off a sudden getting paranoid,i kept on telling myself ‘he got her pregnant and had a yute with her’ to get me even more pissed,and it did,i was fuming, i got his estate like 15 minutes away from the hospital and knocked on his door,i kept knocking and knocking and knocking fuming with anger,i heard him un lock the door and then he opened it.
BOOM.
It went in him nice and slow, his eyes showed the pain,it made me relax,i took it out off him as he fell back,i put it in him again making sure i go deeper.
“THATS HOW I FELT – THATS HOW I FUCKIN FELT WHEN U GAVE HER A YUTE – IT WAS FUCKING YESTERDAY CONNOR –FUCKING YESTERDAY!AFTER ALL THE TIMES WE HAD! LOVE DOESNT MEAN SHIT!”
“sha-shaniqua i love u” he coughed, “don’t say that,love is what we both – what we both are in now,ive always had love for u” he coughed on the floor again holding his stomach,”i didn’t – i didn’t get Monisha pr-“ then he stopped.
He stopped.
“CONNOR” i bent down,”fuckin wake up!” i shook his shoulders.
“connor,don’t do this to me,get up,stop joking” i laughed,my laughing stopped when i knew he wasn’t joking.
I put my hands on my mouth as tears cascaded down my face,hot tears,what did i just do,i steped back,what the fuck did i just do. I looked at my hands,they were full of blood,i screamed and looked at connor.
“CONNOR GET THE FUCK UP STOP IT,ITS NOT FUNNY,JOKES OVER,STOPPPPPPP” I sobbed so hard and loud.
I moved away from him and crossed my legs on the floor,i kept punching myself,i pulled my hair i kicked my legs,”what the fuck have i just done, what the fuck have i just done, what the fuck have i just done” i kept repeating and repeating it over and over again.i screamed and screamed.
My baby,my boo,my life is on the floor in front off me,dead.
Dead.
Dead.
Dead.
On the floor in front off me,lifeless.
I looked up to see him in a pile of blood and screamed,”no no no no no no” i screamed.
The phone rang,i got silent,it rang and rang,i didn’t do anything,i stood still,i got scared,it went to voicemail.

“yo,i cant get to shaniqua phone,but what man did wernt right still,i beg u bell her up and tell her it wernt u it was some ova connor and another Monisha,i just felt like annoyin her,low me,and sorry for any trouble caused yeah,ill leave you two at it den,safe”.

SMURKZ.
IT WAS SMURKZ.
IT WAS FUCKING SMURKZ.
IT WAS FUCKING SMURKZ SAYING I DID THAT TO MONISHA AND THE LOVE OF MY LIFE FOR NOTHING.
IT WAS SMURKZ SAYING I FUCKED UP MY LIFE FOR NO REASON.
SMURKZ.

I SCREAMED.I SCREAMED SO LOUD I COULDNT HEAR MYSELF,MY SCREAM WAS DEAFENING.
I jumped on connor,”no no no im so sorry,connor i love u,get up – PLEASE GET THE FUCK UP,U CANT DO THIS,IM SORRY,IM SORRY IM SORRY,GET UP!” i sobbed and wept , i sobbed and wept for half an hour,on connor. I had enough off screaming and ive had enough off this life,theirs no point of me living,why am i even here,ive ruined so many lifes,ive killed so many people,markos legs are paralyzed because off me,my brothers dead because of me, why has god decided to put me through all this,what did i do to him.
I looked up at the ceiling, “BRING HIM BACKKKKKKK HE DIDNT DO ANYTHIN TO YOU,BRING HIM BACKKK” i banged on Connors chest,god was useless he didn’t do anything,if he wasn’t usless connor would have still been here,in my arms,making love.
I took my top off,and my bra and i took the knife in my hands.
I walked in between Connors legs,still crying  and bawling,i put my hand on his hand and i put my chest against his,i was lying down on top off me,oh how it felt so relaxing,i sighed as my bottom lip trembled,i felt his touch,my chest was full off blood i lifted my left arm up exposing the knife in my hands,should i do this,should i not.
A tear fell down on his chest,i looked at his flesh on me,his blood on me.
“connor,i love you” it went deep,deep into my stomach,i twisted it inside,making sure i felt every single bit of it,because thats how he felt,i wanted to feel what he felt before i killed him,before i took his life,before i took away the love f my life,because off stupidity.
I moved my hands on his arm,feeling him before my time went,rihanna California king bed was playing on mtv.

“chest to chest,nose to nose,plam to plam we were always just that close..” she sang.
A tear fell down onto his chest.

“wrist to wrist” i put my wrist on his.
“toe to toe,lips that felt just like the inside off a rose” with all my energy i managed to push myself up onto his lips,tears cascaded when i felt his touch,his last touch.

“so how come when i reach out my finger,it feels like more than distance between us.......”.

Shaniqua The Sket Chapter 39

I'm not afraid of heights, I'm afraid of falling. I'm not scared of the dark, I'm scared of what's in it. I'm not afraid to love, I'm afraid of not being loved back.I know that things aren’t the same, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t wish they were .I know things will never work out between us but I’m afraid that if I stop trying then it'll be final, but if I don’t give up then I can still have hope, hope always makes me feel more secure. Never give up if you still want to try, Never wipe your tears if you still want to cry, Never settle for the answer if you still want to know, Never say you don’t love him if you cant let him go. you know we both said it.."I love you".."I love you too"
the only difference? I didn’t lie.


My  toes curled up,blood started rushing to my head,i started feeling light headed,this couldn’t be happeneing,this wasn’t happeing,i put my hand on my head,all off a sudden mixed emotions started hitting me,love,frustration,fear,anger.
Anger.
Anger.
Anger.
I gripped tightly pon the phone as i looked up,Smurkz was laughing with the magazine in his face.
“Smurkz”.
He put the magazine down, “yeah” he was trying not to laugh.
I started getting vex i started getting BARE vex.
I gripped onto the phone.
“fucking bitch” i screamed and threw it right in his eye.
“U FUCKING SLUT – WHAT THE FUCK” he held onto his eye as he fell onto the floor from the sofa from all the pain,i  turned around,connor was in the bathroom,i didn’t know how to feel  i actually didn’t know how to feel.
I ran out the flat,running as fast as i can,suddenly i buckled when i got to the shops and a group off 13 year olds across the road started laughing got up and touched the graze on my forhead,it fucking hurt.
I looked at my heels and the left one had broke,i knew i should have got the leapord print ones from next,stupid cheap asos. i looked up and saw the group off boys coming towards me.
It was bare cold,the breeze was mad,i was wearing high waisted jeans with a vest top.
“yo u alright miss” one off the youngers said – he looked bare like T.I , like a proper younger version.
One tried grabbing onto my thigh,i moved and gave him some look, “i said,im alright”.
I kissed my teeth and took my heels off and started walking bare fast barefoot,the little stones on the floor was hurting my feet.
I ran – i ran for my life,i ran anywhere,i didn’t care if people were watching me,my life was ruined,why should i care.
I got to a bus stop and the 300 was their,i jumped on it and begged the man if i could get on,he let me on and i sat downstairs at the back ,i started crying, everyone was watching me but i didn’t care,i just started bawling bare hard,an old lady turned around and gave me a tissue.
“thank you” i said and wiped my tears with the tissues.
The bus stopped at a bus stop and a familiar face got on.
“shaniquais that u” he came towards the back off the bus and hugged me,everyone was watching by now like say it was eastenders on the back of the bus.
“what the fuck u looking at” he said to some next Russian man staring at my thighs.
Everyone got shook when he said that and didn’t look no more,i looked up and sighed.
“prince my lifes so fucked up” i started bawling even more.
“ah stop cryin” he kissed my forhead,he bent his face down so we looked at eachother,i thought he was gonna kiss me.
“whats wrong beautiful?” he asked.
I just looked back at him.
He chuckled,”you cant talk nuh?”.
“its..its him” i said while my heart burst inside when ‘him’ got mentioned.
“who?” he asked giving me a crunchie bar.
I took it and started opening it while sniffing,”i don’t wanna talk about it”.
He rubbed my back,”its cool ,i understand,but its my stop b , i need to go still,mums gain mad,but ill call u late yeah?” he said as the bus stopped.
“um,yeah” i smiled at him and he kissed my cheek then got off,but my heart was still breaking up inside,how the fuck could he do that to me? I knew he didn’t mean SHIT in the first place! Why did i even waste my time! Im a fucking sket,no man likes me,they use me for beat,for head,i kept telling myself that on the bus making me feel even more stressed.
I threw the rest off the crunchie bar in the seat next to me and i got off at my stop,i knew where i was going,home.
The place Davontae and me grew up,the place so many memories were made,the place i was safe at.
I cried as i walked home with my heels in my hands,my mascara ran down my face,and my hair fucked up with big and small strands off hair coming out off my messy bun,i felt my phone still inbetween my breasts,the only thing i had,the only thing i had,fuck connor,fuck Monisha,fuck them both,fuck the yute he had with Monisha,fuck my life,i HATE both of them and never want to see them again,actually i do want to see them again,i knew why.
I wiped my tears and fixed my hairs,i put my heels on the floor and started wlaking,i fixed my jeans and top and wiped my mascara off my face,it was just me walking on this road,it was dark around 9pm,when i finally got to my house,i got the key from under the plant pot,where it always is and opened it,the lights upstairs where on,i heard voices,someone was beating upstairs,and i knew who,tula.
“TULAAAAAAAAA” i called out.
I heard her say “ shit,get out ,thats my sister” bare loud thinking i wont hear,i started chuckling to myself,my sister was a sket,like me,and basically i couldn’t her lectures on how to be good and shit and ‘lead her into the right path’ of like because i couldn’t chat,look at me.
She came downstairs with no make up on and a towel around her,she didn’t notice their was cum down her leg.
“shan,what are u doing here?”
I looked at her,admiring her face,i shrugged my shoulders.
“did u get that text i sent u – about marko” she said coming downstairs.
“yeah- why does he wanna see me” i asked as we both went into the kitchen.
“i dunno – he belled me home cuh he didn’t have ur number i think then i told him u wernt here so he said text her that i wanna see her -  hes in hospital unah he cant-“
“yeah man,whatever,ill just see him tomorrow” i interrupted not giving a shit,i really didn’t wanna see him tomorrow,my head was hurting bare and my stomach was going up and down,it was grumbling and i was feeling sick.
We both sat down on the sofa,when her butters man walked out the house, i burst out crying, i started bawling and bawling.
“shaniqua – whats wrong” she asked as she put her juice down and came to hug me.
“that fuckin bitch – Monisha” i wept.
“the cheung one? What she do” she asked as she hugged me and gave me some tissues.
“that fuckin liar,MY man,has a yute wit her” i lifted my head up, “ ive got HIV too tula”.
Her face looked so shocked,she couldn’t speak,”you-youve got hiv?” she asked scared.
“y-yeah”.
She shuffled away slightly from me abit,i looked up at her and scrunched up my forhead,i got bare angry and stood up, “FUCK YOU U FUCKIN SKET, U DONT EVEN GIVE TWO SHITS!” i spat at her and ran out the door.
I as bare angry at the fact she moved away from me,why the fuck would she do that,shes my stinking sister for gods sake,shes supposed to support me fuck my life! I fell onto the floor,5 minutes away from my house,in front off the park,it was so dark and me and connor were supposed to leave for Barbados at 4 in the morning today because we was going to move their and live their happily ever after,fuck this shit,theirs no such thing as a happy ending,theirs no such thing as a family,as love,as happiness,but there is such thing as jealousy,hate, despite, misery,fuckery.
i had no life,their was no point of me on this planet, why am i still here,i bring sadness to people,i bring un happiness and misery,i was so fucked off i started gripping onto bits off my hair and pulling it,bits off rain starting falling down,i looked up as rain drops landed on my face.
“CONNNNNNNNNNNORRRRRRRRRRRR”, i screamed as tears where mixing with the rain,thunder hit.
then i knew where i was gonna go, i knew what i had to do,i started running,i started running bare fast as bits off stones were getting crushed as i ran over them,m y feet were bruised and full off blood,i had to run 15 minutes to get to her house,i was gonna teach this bitch a lesson,i didn’t care if i was gonna get fucked up,i didn’t care if i was gonna die tonight,i was gonna let my emotions out and not be shook for once,because ive lost everything,theris no need for me to re think things twice,ive lost him – and ive lost everyone,no ones here for me,except prince,but i don’t even feel comfortable talking to him.
I got to her estate after 15 minutes off running,i ran up the stairs all soaked in water,some rasta man who stank off weed and piss smacked my ass as i ran up the stairs,i didn’t care i kept on running when i got to the 5th floor of her and Smurkz estate,fuck him too.
I knocked on the door vigorously, my hair in wet curls and face with no make up,i looked kinda nice i thought in my mind.
She opened the door in tears,she thought i didn’t know,fuckin bitch.
“shaniqua – im so-so happy your here” she leapt onto me.
I grabbed her hair and pushed her into the flat.
I pushed her down onto the floor,she started bawling harder, “u fuckin bitch,after everything i do for u,u knew he was my man,u knew i loved him to fuckin bits,I WOULD KILL FOR HIM” i screamed with tears down my face.
She held onto her stomach,hope that yutes dead,i hope she dies,im gonna make sure,im gonna kill her,tonight.
I bent down and grabbed her neck and slammed her onto the glass coffee table,and said "u fucked my life up – i have NOTHIN , i have fuckin NOTHIN" i sobbed.
 "i..i di-“ i didn’t let her finish her sentence,i kicked her in the face and made sure i broke her nose by kicking her again and again, i made sure i heard a few bones crack before i left this flat.
She grabbed my foot as i tried kicking her in her face again , i fell back againt the wall,i held onto my head it fuckin hurt so badly ,she got up - she grabbed my hair with her left hand and kneed me in the pussy with her right leg. I grabbed her tits so hard she let go off my hair and i twisted them as she screamed form the top off her voice,i grabbed her neck and put her in a head lock and started punching the yute in her stomach – if it was still their.
I started spitting in her hair,this bitch pissed me off so badly,she aint the last one tonight getting this for sure.
The door opened and all i saw was some next man,it looked like her uncle,that Kevin guy i met once,he took a gun out,my mind started getting light headed when i saw it,it put too much pressure in my head,i heard his lips move without making noise,my mind started spinning,i dropped Monisha down on the floor,i didn’t know if she was alive,he took the gun out and pulled the trigger,i closed my eyes and gripped onto my stomach as a large pain came rushing through my body.

Shaniqua The Sket Chapter 38

Our legs were entwined and we were feeling this moment, his arms wrapped around me,i was breathing in his his breath,palm to palm,wrist to wrist,toe to toe, “ ur safe now,man wont let no one touch my girl again” he held my chin as we were in bed,i smiled and put my arms around his neck,i felt bare safe.

“whats happened to them now – are they like,with the feds?” i asked.

“yeah – got caught by the feds cause neighbours next door was complaining of what dey saw – the old lady next door said dey saw dem pushing u in the house” he pecked my lips,i tasted colgate.

“mhmm” my pussy was kinda sore cause off all the fucking we done,8 hours straight we done.

I sighed while he bit his lip, “your so fuckin cheung , even wen uve got hair covering half ur face” he laughed and took the hair out my face, i giggled, but then i got bare angry all off a sudden,fear and anger both rushed into my head,i sighed and felt my forehead screwing up, i took my hands off his neck.

“why the fuck would u do that” i asked him.

“do what?” he asked not letting me take my palm out his hand,he kissed my thumb, “ i love you, dats why, i really do – would any ova man do that? Real talks shan , i actually fink im crazy in love with you” he laughed and shook his head, “ man don’t know whats happening to him , ive got HIV now” he laughed.

I ended up laughing, “stupid boy, i shouldn’t have let u” i jumped back into his arms and looked at him straight in the eyes,our eyes locked and everythin around me felt bare soft. But then my eyes started watering up and my bottom lip started trembling like i was gonna burst into tears.

He came closer,i closed my eyes and he kissed both off them, “why did u have to do that , why the fuck would you do that to urself” i wiped the tears coming down.

“shut up man – i fuckin love u” he came and hugged me bare tight.

I sniffed and put my arms around his waist – the sun was rising, then my phone rang.

“don’t lie youve got dat ringtone” he laughed, “ that was like,so last year” he said in a bitch girl American voice.

I burst out laughing,he sounded bare gay,but a beautiful gay,i giggled to myself as i got up and got my phone.

I looked at the ID and it was Prince, i walked off into the bathroom to answer it, connor called my name but i ignored it.

“hello” i picked up.

“yoo shaniqua”

“u alright”

“yh im bless still, man has to tell u suttin”

“well go on then”

“nah i have to meet u to tell u ”

I sighed “prince i cant meet u im very busy” i wanted to spend the day with connor.

He kissed his teeth, “ ite” he took a deep breath,his voice was bare sexy,deep but like a permenant sore throat,any girl would be lucky to have him, “well.......” he went silent.

“yeah?” i started getting unpatient.

“SHANIQUAAAA who is it” connor called out from the bedroom.

“who was dat?” prince asked.

“never mind ,just look – hurry up please i need to go” i was getting pissed off.

“ite......” he took a breath, “well mans decided to develope feelings for u and ting,and dis isn’t no joke ting,cause man been dreaming about u and shit,i got proper feelings for u unah ,ive been hovering over ur name on my phone for like 3 days wondering if i should call u and trust me shaniqua i don’t  get feelings for girls,its a lash and dash ting – u get me, but nah dis is proper man wants to make u wifey” .

I wanted to lauf when he said he had been dreaming about me and shit but to be honest i really didn’t know what to say.

“i.i...i have a man prince and i love him alot,im so sorry i didn-“ he cut me off.

“yeah i knew dis would happen,i shouldn’t have even told u about my feelings,ur the fuckin first girl ive even said dis to,i fuckin poured my heart out” he kissed his teeth,i didn’t say anything,the phone had some awkward silence for abit.

“nah i shouldn’t have been dat rude,sorry shaniqua its cool u have a man,and i know dat ur a good wife because ur telling me u have a man and u love him, sorry init,its just i like u bare and ive been thinkin about u 24 7,but hes waiting for u init,i guess i should go”he sighed,i felt sorry for him,he was a very beautiful boy,but i had my connor.

“its cool prince,and im so sorry,but we could be friends” i smiled.

He laughed, ”yeah -yeah we could”.

“um so ill see you around,bye prince,take care” i said while sctratching my leg.

“yeah,take care shan” he locked off.

I looked in the bathroom mirror and sighed to myself,i touched my hair,then my nose then my lips,i was really chueng and i should thank god for the features he gave me,the caramel skin,the tight curls,the natural raised eyebrows and  rihannas soft lips, i was thinking off dying my hair red, then cutting it abit to make it shoulder lenghth.

I walked back into the living room,connor was reading a newspaper on the edge off the bed,i went behind  him and kissed his neck,he reached out for my hand and i gave it to him,he kissed my thumb and put it near his heart.

“what u reading?” i asked.

“this little girl got shanked to death – in east London,next men came her house den raped her mutha then kidnapped the little 9 year old – they said if der mutha don’t end up paying 10 grand den their gonna kill the girl – dey didn’t have the money so the little girl got shanked up, sad alie”.

“stuipid cunts,why would they do that?” i got bare angry,i sat on his lap as he kept on reading it,it was the first time i ever saw him read a newspaper.

“so are we going barbadoes for my tr – our treatment?” i asked.

He nodded , “ yeah – my aunt had HIV and they gave good treatment to her,some old family doctor – oh shit,speaking off family,ive forgotten bout my mum bruv” he laughed and looked up.

I wanted to punch something as soon as he mentioned his mum,his mum kicked me out when i THOUGHT i was pregnant,with her stupid machine device thing.

He got his phone and dialled his mums number,i sat next to him on the bed, i yawned and walked to the bathroom while he was on the phone to his mum, i locked the door and sat down to take a piss,i saw little hairs growing on my pussy again,i needed to go for a wax.

I was gonna pick up my tooth brush but my phone started ringing again,i swear this cracked iphone was gonna get it,i didn’t bother looking up at the ID.

“hello” i said annoyed.

The line was silent for abit,but i knew someone was their.

“oh my gosh,HELLO?”.

Someone sniffed across the line.

“who is it?” i asked calmly.

She sniffed again,then i heard her croaky voice, “sh..shan” she burst out crying.

“Monisha?” i put my tooth brush down,i rested my left hand on the sink, “whats happened babygirl? Are u alright?”

“sha- shan, its-“ she sniffed again “its Smurkz”

I was getting abit annoyed with the problems they always have,theyre always argueing.

“what is it? Is he being a prick again?”

She started crying then sniffed, “nah its not even that, - he” she sniffed AGAIN. “he brought his boys round to the flat,then – they started r-“ she burst into tears again.

“what?!” i was bare pissed off, imagine trey songz coming your yard and your asleep for the whole time hes at your yard,and hes never gonna come again.

She was still crying, “im belling him now and then,ill call u in a bit” i hanged up before she could answer.

I went back into the room to tell connor but he was changing into his clothes – i looked at him for a bit,he didn’t realise i was looking at him,i didn’t think he realised i was their,but i didn’t want him to get involved,after what he did for me..i dotn want to bother him anymore,hes already got HIV because of me.

I walked back into the bathroom in my PJ shorts and vest top and locked the door, i looked for Smurkz in my contact list then texted him because i was over my contract already so i didn’t wanna use minutes.

‘come 12 roadside hill avenue,its Connors yard,don’t fink off starting commotion after what happened,wen ‘we’ tried shanking him up,its over and done with,i need to talk to u asap,its really important,and i fuckin mean it.’

SENT.

I was brushing my teeth when i received a text like one minute later,i spat out the white shit.

‘kool’ he replied.

I kissed my teeth and continued brushing my teeth, i jumped in the shower and made sure i scrubbed myself hard,i scrubbedmyself harder around my pussy thinking that my HIV will go away, but it wouldn’t work because i knew it wouldn’t go.i just bawled for 10 minutes in the shower,to get everyfin out,all these meotions trapped,i had to accept life how it is,but like if u make wrong decisions in life u have to face the consequinces alie? I stopped crying cause it ownt get me anywhere,my pussy stung because off how much i scrubbed,i touched it and started crying. Connor knocked on the door.

“shan – u alright?” he opened the door,i thought i locked it.

I looked up,i was on the bathroom floor wrapped around in a towel,shivering and crying.

“shaniqua mannnnn” he came and hugged me,he kissed my forehead, “why u crying now eh? Everythings gonna be alright man,i promise” i nodded and he helped me get dressed,he made me scrambled eggs on toast and we both enjoyed the meal tucking in.

“remember that time we first fucked” he burst out laughing.

I kissed my teeth, “yeah like 5 months ago – oh my, i was so stupid, how can u grab my hand from behind and start pulling me towards u,u were some stranger u know,and u know what the funny thing is?”.

He was still laughing.

“we fucked like the next day,i gave my virginity to u man – how stupid was i – a boy i just met on road”

We both started cracking up.

He put his hand on mine on the table, “ but true say, look where its gotten us now”.

I smiled and giggled.

The door bell rang.

Connor pushed his plate away and was gonna stand up to get it.

“connor”

He looked back, “yeah”

I didn’t know what to say,”its Smurkz at the door”

His face screwed nicely when i mentioned Smurkz! It was emotional,the screw on Connors face.

“why the fuck is dis dickhead at the door,is he stupid” he got up.

“CONNOR” i shouted back.

He turned around,”what man” he said with the screwface still on.

“hes here because i want to talk to him,its about Monisha?”

“don’t piss me off” he got off his chair.

“CONNOR” i felt like i was gonna cry.

“what man!” he turned around proper pissed.

“if u love me” i said calmly.

His screwface dropped and he looked calm, he kissed his teeth and walked into the bathroom,i heard him lock it,i sighed and answered the door,it was smurkz,his hair was out in a bush,it was up to his ears,but it was still a bush,his jeans,his nike shirt and his black and white airforces,he looked on point,i wanted to punch him in the face right now.

He stepped in, “nice place” he got comfy on the sofa.

“why the fuck did u get Monisha duppied” i got straight to the point,making sure i put my hands on my hips and rock out these asos jet black heels.

He laughed and put the magazine down,”i didn’t get Monisha duppied” he took his phone out and started fidgeting with it.

“u raped her Smurkz! Why the fuck would u do that”.

“yeah i did rape her but i didn’t duppie her”

“who the fuck did then?” i was trying not to get that rude because Smurkz wouldn’t hesitate to box me in the face.

“you really wanna know?” he laughed.

I nodded.

He went on his htc phone,and looked like he was going through things , “read the text” he said,then leaned back.

“its Friday init” he said,i got confused and just took his phone.

‘yeah 7 bills for Monisha,shes got mans yute,make sure u kill dat shit in her while ur at it holla at man wen ur done’

Sent : Thursday 12 May 19:48

Sender : Connor.

Shaniqua The Sket Chapter 37

I opened my eyes to see bright light, I squinted and clocked my brain was banging against my skull, it hurt so much, I was on a bed and I knew where – hospital. I hated this place so much.

“oi blud, nurse, shes awake, come quick” it was Connor – thank god, his voice made my heartbeat smooth – I knew I was gonna be safe with him. He came and kissed my forhead “ shan thank fuck your alright,i swear no one is gonna touch you again,i swear to god, im always gonna be with you” he kissed my forhead again and hugged me tight,my hair was getting in my face.i smiled at him when he let go and sat down on the edge off the bed and held my hand.I slowly lifted my back up and looked around,i couldn’t remember anything from yesterday,i only remembered when termaine and chris kicked me down; i didn’t know how i got here. Connor looked so different, he hadn’t shaved and he had goatee, his slits in his eyebrows were disappearing but you could see them faintly, but he still had a fresh shape up, my baby.

“Connor how did I get here? I don’t remember anything” I said.

He was going to say something but the nurse came along with a doctor, the nurse came and started un plugging some wires from the machine while the doctor stood next to the bed with a clipboard, he was wearing glasses and was very old, I held onto Connors hand tighter,”shaniqua I’m Dr.Jones and I have some bad news and some good news”.

I looked at Connor and he squeezed my hand re assuring me everything was gonna be alright.

“Yes” I said faintly.

“The good news is ms coremstell your free to go today but the bad news is –“he stopped a second “the bad news is you’ve got HIV” he looked up.

My heart sunk, his words repeated in my head ‘you’ve got HIV, you’ve got HIV, and you’ve got HIV’

I looked at connor, he just looked back, his eyes were watery, he kissed my hand and I felt a tear drop onto it, i fucking love him, what have I done to deserve him.

I looked at the doctor, “are you sure doctor jones, maybe there’s something wrong in the test or may-“I got so confused.

“Shaniqua – I’m sure, we carried out the test twice – we found fresh semen in your womb which was infected with HIV”

“What do you mean fresh?” I asked.

“He means the-“I looked at Connor, he stopped talking and looked down, and he sighed.

I was so confused.

“Shaniqua – you were raped yesterday – did you not know?”

“Raped?” I asked, i couldn’t get it into my head, how did I have HIV? I couldn’t have HIV.

“Yes raped, we found different kind off semen in your vagina, but luckily there is treatment for HIV, i put you through to burdocks hospital in Essex for treatments starting next week so don’t get stressed

And then it all became sense yesterday...Chris, termaine.

I shook my head and started bawling, I bawled so hard for 15 minutes to get my emotions out, connor was hugging me so tightly throughout but I didn’t stop, it was just so hard to take in, my life being fucked up already then I hear this, ive got HIV.

“Shan hush” he held both my hands and faced me on the bed, he wiped my tears, oh gosh I don’t deserve him, I really don’t – “Shan were gonna make it, me and you, just us against the world, I don’t care if you got-“he paused, he didn’t want to say the word, “where still gonna be together Shan, I’m gonna fucking die holding your hand” he said as tears were coming out his eyes. I just started bawling even harder into his hands, he took my hands and we both embraced the moment as we put our heads together. i looked up,” I don’t deserve you” I managed to say while bawling.

He looked up and wiped my tears,” don’t say that” he whispered.

He came and hugged me, i hugged him back, i didn’t care anymore, i wasn’t gonna carry on with these skittish movements, it’s just me and connor, me and him against the world, us.

I sniffed and he laughed.

“Why the fuck you laughing?” I asked him while wiping my tears.

“Your – your bare beautiful when you cry” he smiled and kissed my hand again.

“Shut up” I managed to laugh a little bit.

Then there was a knock on the door, we both turned around and saw a nurse stepping in.

“Miss you have a visitor” she stepped to the side and let her in.

I wanted to scream, “GET THIS FUCKING BITCH OUT”.

“Shaniqua I only want-“

“GET OUT, GET OUT” I screamed, I was gonna have a panic attack; i hated this woman with passion, my mother.

“Calm down “Connor said, i started breathing heavily has Connor lead my mum back out.

I hated the woman with passion that hoes.

Connor came back and held me,”shes gone, be calm” he kissed me, i held on to his neck.

“connor promise me youll never leave me” i said in his ear.

He kissed my check, “never,your mine,no ones gonna touch you, no chris breddah,no termaine breddah,i swear shaniqua i would kill for you,im sorry bout the tings dat happened in the past,but ive got u now” he held my hands.

I smiled back,he reminded me how much off a bitch i had been to him,with different man and that,i had never stayed faithful.

“shan were gonna leave this country no more mess,no  more commotion,gonna be calm,south London is fucked,we cant stay here,theirs bare mans after me here you know, y-“ he said.

“why are their bare mans after you?” i interrupted.

He looked like he didn’t wanna say anything then he did, “that day man clocked abbie and chris had taken you and they were doing that to you” he stopped and just stared at me.

“yeah?” i said.

“well man went to abbies yard and shanked up her dad” he looked down.

My mouth opened,”chris why the fuck would you do that?”.

He sctracthed his head,” i dunno,man pissed me off when she tried killing you bruv,thats on some next levels,now her batty boy cousins are after me” he got up.

“who? Tyrone?” i said.

“yeah them mans” he said while fixing his chain.

Tyrone was some breh you didn’t wanna get involved wit,give him a screw on road then your dead next morning,let alone kill his uncle,shit.

“where you goin?” i asked.

“we’re goin home,come”

“but are they gonna let me out”

“yeah didn’t u hear , that doctor said ur free to go today”

“oh alright” i got up,my head was hurting so bad,i felt a bandaged wrapped around my stomach.

I sighed and held my tears back,i was going to get out off here no matter what.

Connor helped me undress from the hospital gown into my own clothes , he brought on the way to hospital , i swear i don’t even know why this boys still with me, i don’t fucking deserve him.

He kissed my head as we walked out off hospital and into his whip.

We was driving back to his yard,”connor what did chris and termaine do to me?” i looked at him as i put my hand on the bandage around my stomach.

The traffic light was red as we were stuck in traffic on the north circular.

He looked back,”they-they ra-“ he stopped and didn’t carry on.

I knew what he said.

“was it just them?” i asked.

“no – their were – their were 7” he started getting angry as he screwed up his forhead.

I put my hand on his hand which was on the gear,i layed back on the seat and sighed while we were in traffic.

“and did,did you save me?” i asked when we got to his yard.

He looked at me and opened the door,i stepped in and so did he.

“i tried shan” he lifted his top up to show bruises over his beautiful chest.

I tried holding back my tears but it didn’t work,i jumped into his arms,he held me tight “i fuckin love u” i said.

He kissed my neck.

Then my lips.

Then my chest.

Then going down and kissing my cleavage.

I wrapped my legs around his waist as he walked to the living room with me wrapped around him like some spider.

He put me on the floor and took his top off.

I stopped him,” connor,you cant do this,ive got – ive got hiv,ur going to get it if we do it” i said quitley.

“and you don’t understand how much i love you for me to be doing this,do you” he smiled,i laughed .

“yeah yeah whatever” i laughed and treid getting up.

He stopped me,”you really don’t understand how much i love you do you” he kissed my lips.

It felt so good,i couldn’t stop him,he made me feel like i was the only girl in the world.

I shivered when he started sucking on my nipples.

“connor” i moaned,

He pulled up the skirt he brought me and took my knickers off.

I pulled away,”ahh connor you cant do this to yourse-“

“shhh” he put his lips back on mine,i smiled as he was kissing me, he was actually taking the risk,hes gonna have hiv too,hes mad! But i fuckin love this mad boy; i love him too much.

Then he did it,he went in.

“baby” i sighed because off the pleasure, “you don’t know what you just done to yourself” i whispered while my head was tilted back with tears down my eyes, i didn’t want him to see i was crying.

He lifted my head up with his left hand,and kissed on my tears “don’t cry,i love you,see it feels good”

He kissed my neck and smiled.

I kissed him and our bodies were pressed against eachother.

He was going slow,his big fat dick all rammed up in my pussy.

“shaniqua-shaniqua tell me i own your pussy,tell me i own you,tell me your mine”

I was hot and bothered , “you own me connor,you own every.single.part.off.me,you own my pussy.”

I held onto his neck as he went in and out off me,feeling me,kissing me,loving me.

I came like 3 times in every 15 minutes.

It felt so fucking good,that night me and connor made love,we made love sideways,we made love front ways,we made love backways,we made love in every way,we made love on the floor,made love on the kitchen table,in the bedroom and on the sofa,the whole night i felt connor,i felt him emotionally and physically,he made me feel so good,no other human can do what he does to me,if i ever lost my connor i would die,i would literally kill myself,we were going to go Barbados in two days,and start a new life their,he said we could go get better treatment their because his aunt had HIV.

It was Just us against the world.....

Connor and shaniqua.